Norah Vincent was a journalist, author, and columnist who gained fame for her book Self-Made Man, in which she documented her 18-month experiment of living as a man. She died by suicide in July 2022, several years after her gender-bending adventure. What led her to take this drastic step? What did she learn from her experience as a man? And what can we learn from her life and death?
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The Self-Made Man Experiment
Norah Vincent was born in Detroit in 1968 and grew up in both the US and the UK. She graduated from Williams College with a degree in philosophy and worked as an editor and journalist for various publications. She was also a lesbian and a feminist who was curious about the male perspective on life.
In 2003, she decided to embark on a daring experiment: to disguise herself as a man and infiltrate various male-dominated spaces. She hired a makeup artist, shaved her head, wore a fake beard and chest hair, bound her breasts, and changed her voice. She adopted the name Ned and presented herself as a salesman.
She joined a bowling league, a men’s therapy group, a monastery, a strip club, and even dated women as Ned. She wrote about her findings in her book Self-Made Man, which was published in 2006 and became a bestseller.
The Dark Side of Masculinity
Vincent’s book revealed some surprising insights into the male psyche. She found that men were more welcoming, supportive, and friendly than she expected. She also discovered that men faced a lot of pressure, loneliness, and violence in their lives.
She wrote that men were expected to be tough, competitive, and successful, but also to suppress their emotions and vulnerabilities. She witnessed how men suffered from sexism, homophobia, and abuse from other men and women. She also experienced how difficult it was to date women as a man, especially when she had to lie about her identity.
Vincent said that living as a man made her appreciate being a woman more. She realized that women had more freedom, flexibility, and empathy than men. She also gained more sympathy and understanding for men and their struggles.
The Breakdown and the Suicide
However, Vincent’s experiment also took a toll on her mental health. She said that living as a man was exhausting, stressful, and depressing. She felt alienated from herself and her loved ones. She developed anxiety, insomnia, and paranoia. She also suffered from gender dysphoria, which is the distress caused by the mismatch between one’s gender identity and assigned sex.
After 18 months of living as Ned, Vincent had a nervous breakdown and checked herself into a psychiatric hospital. She was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder. She wrote about this experience in her second book Voluntary Madness, which was published in 2008.
Vincent continued to struggle with her mental illness for the next few years. She tried various treatments, including medication, therapy, meditation, and yoga. She also remarried her ex-wife Kristen Erickson in 2019.
However, none of these helped her overcome her suicidal thoughts. In July 2022, she traveled to Switzerland with Erickson and ended her life at a clinic that offered assisted suicide. She was 53 years old.
Her death was not reported until August 2022 by The New York Times. The cause of death was confirmed by Justine Hardy, a friend of Vincent’s who said that it was a “voluntary assisted death” according to sitename.
The Legacy of Norah Vincent
Norah Vincent was a courageous and controversial writer who challenged the stereotypes and norms of gender and society. She exposed the realities and complexities of being a man and a woman in the modern world. She also raised awareness about the issues of mental health and suicide.
Her books have been praised by critics and readers alike for their honesty, humor, and insight. They have also sparked debates and discussions about gender roles, identity, and equality.
Norah Vincent’s death cause of death is tragic but not surprising. She was a woman who lived on the edge of life and death. She was brave enough to explore the unknown but also vulnerable enough to suffer from it.
She left behind a legacy of words that will continue to inspire, challenge, and enlighten us for years to come.
